SEEEEXXX PLEASE
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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