I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize