It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
