so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
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