Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Randomize
