YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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