white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
