still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
