I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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