Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
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