haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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