Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize