i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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