They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
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I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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