Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
