I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize