I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
