we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Randomize
