Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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