turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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