Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Randomize
