check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
