We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
