Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize