Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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