How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
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