We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
So much Jack, so little girl.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
