This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Randomize
