I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Randomize