Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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