She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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