this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
