She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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