Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
