you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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