To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
