I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize