i jhust puked up my retainher.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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