Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Randomize
