i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
