Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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