he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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