her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Randomize
