Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
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