oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
