Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
