We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NoShamevember. You game?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize