So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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