Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
