What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize