just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
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